Category: Funny Stories
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Social Media For Dogs
Adults my age are sometimes asked about life before the internet. Admittedly, in my case, such questions tend to be asked by twenty something daughters who correctly assume that I will enjoy being treated like the grandfather in the Werther’s Original advert. I have a stock answer that I roll out for such occasions involving…
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Appetite
Mr Pamplemousse spread his ample form over the chair’s cushion and gave his napkin an ostentatious flick. Casting a glance around the room, he grasped his cutlery eagerly. He could hardly believe his luck! Last week he had been reporting on the Woman’s Institute outing and lost dogs and now he was the envy of…
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The Assembly
A story about putting on a children’s assembly. Hopefully it contains some characters that teachers and children will recognise! Miss Jennings looked at her reception class and sighed. It was their assembly for parents this afternoon and they were nowhere near ready. Mind you, she thought, they could practice for another week and they still…
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No Laughing Matter
A story that imagines what happens when terrorists get wise. Suitable for 11+ children and adults. “Base, this is 6-4 Alpha 12. Comm check; over.” “Loud and clear Alpha 12, what have you got?” “I.A.D. alright, ‘bout the size of a wheelie bin – looks tricky.” “Okay, keep in touch and be careful.” Be careful, be…
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Castle Park Creatures
My school, Castle Park in Kendal, has lovely grounds and I imagined what some of the animals who live there might get up to when the children go home. It was a late summer’s evening in the grounds of Castle Park and tucked away in the long grass under a beech tree, a group of…
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100 word monster stories
Two stories I wrote as examples for pupils asked to write a story involving a monster in exactly 100 words. Victim Mr Rench, the drunken owner of ‘The Sunshine Orphan’s Home’ pushed Kacey into the attic. “I’ll be back in 20 minutes, get cleaning you brat.” Kacey looked around in despair and saw movement under…
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Poochnapped
An eight chapter children’s story for lovers of dogs, ghosts and bad jokes. Chapter 1 “And so,” said Mrs Chapman, “as part of our study of the local area, I’d like you to all find out about the history of one of Foxington’s old buildings.” “Please Miss,” squealed Candice Snell, “I could write about my…
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Jack Saves The Day
A children’s story with a central character who is more than a little autobiographical! Jack was seriously annoyed. His friend Carly had texted last night to say she’d be playing ‘Alien Attacker 3’ today and he could go online to join in. Instead, his mother had announced she had to help mind the shop and…
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Next
My class have been writing stories for the Radio 2 500 word competition and this was my attempt. I’m worried about my sister. Now I know that’s a fairly normal statement for a nine year old to make, so perhaps I should add some detail. I’m worried about my sister killing me. I’ve had 5…